harlow honey child

it will come as a surprise to absolutely none of you that i just love my little harlow dog. harlow’s mom passed away a few months ago and she’s only a few years older than harlow and it totally freaked me out. anyway harlow is happy and healthy and i plan to keep her that way. today she’s been particularly sweet.

maybe i’m biased but i think she has the sweetest/funniest personality. here’s why:
she won’t sit on a cold hard, floor. if we’re in the kitchen and i tell her to sit she does this funny little wiggle and backs up but she just can’t bring herself to put her little bum on the old floor. 
she can’t jump on my bed with something in her mouth. is this normal? i don’t know but it’s hilarious to me.
when she needs to go outside she goes and stands by the door and then sticks her head around the bookcase and stares at me and waits for me to notice/read her mind. 
she almost never ever barks and i love her for it.
before she sleeps she always fluffs her sleeping spot (whether it’s her bed, the floor, the couch) by pawing at it like crazy then flopping around on her back before settling down. 
she can hear a string cheese being opened from about a mile away. 
and lastly the other day i was sitting on my couch reading and she walked up, bit the end of my sock, pulled it off then proceeded to roll around with it. 
i love my little weirdo!
what are some funny things that your pet does?

let’s talk about capsule wardrobes

have you heard of this? after natalie posted hers i became kind of obsessed with the idea. i think it’s a good thing for two reasons:

1. it has totally kept me busy in between searching for a job and avoiding the yucky parts of life right now.
2. i am pretty sure hoarding tendencies run in my family.

i’ve always been drawn to the idea of minimalism. when i read about how people live minimally i think they must be really self actualized or have incredible self control – two qualities i very much admire. that being said i love to shop. like, it really makes me happy. sometimes even if i know i’ll probably never (or rarely) wear something i’m so drawn to a color or pattern that i end up buying it. and that, my friends, is how you end up on an episode of hoarders.

minimalist wardrobes aren’t a new thing. diana posted this years ago and i saved it because i was just so fascinated with the idea of having a tiny wardrobe. and even longer ago erin did a thirty items for thirty days challenge. so with these lovely ladies as inspiration i decided to take the plunge.

first things first i downloaded caroline’s capsule wardrobe planner and spent days browsing my pinterest boards to figure out what my style is. i still don’t really know…  but as i pinned away the words that came to mind were preppy, boho, pink.

my goals:

comfort: i want my clothes to fit well and be comfortable. this seems like the biggest “duh” statement but i either buy things a little too big because i don’t want them to be tight or am feeling self conscious and then end up feeling sloppy and self conscious or i hang try to make things work that aren’t quite the right size or style and end up feeling uncomfortable and self conscious.

feminine: i like a little pink or a ruffle detail here and there. i enjoy wearing skirts and dresses, and with tights. i like a some sparkle. ban.do always saves the day here.

modest: i kind of dread using that word. if anyone says “modest is the hottest” i’ll poke them in the eye. i feel most comfortable covered up. i don’t care if it’s hot or not.

structured: i really love the peasant, flowy look but it just doesn’t work for me. i promise i would wear peasant tops and chiffon skirts all day long if i could. but one thing i’ve learned about my style is that a little structure helps me feel more put together and more confident.

second, to be completely honest the amount of money i plan on spending for this fall capsule is zero dollars. some people budget a certain amount for each season and that’s completely awesome. but given my no job/potential hoarding situation i’m going to work with what i have. and i have plenty. so far i’ve taken two very large garbage bags to goodwill and di and it’s made feel kind of wasteful. why buy something if i’m just going to get rid of it in a few months? even if it is only $20? and there are several storage tubs going into the garage for future seasons or to sell. maybe for the winter i’ll budget for a pair of boots.
i lied. i do want a pair of these.

my have-it-all-together date is september 21st. totally doable. i think. it’s actually turned out to be a lot more effort than i anticipated. i feel like the end result will be a good thing but right now there are piles and boxes of clothes and empty hangers everywhere. my poor harlow is under the bed… which is probably a good idea.

have you ever done a capsule wardrobe? or a mini wardrobe? are you going to?

top image from ny mag featuring chloé pieces, hunting down sources for the other images 

moon river

saturday morning i woke up sobbing and i have no idea why. waking up means i must have slept and that’s a good thing and i don’t remember having any upsetting dreams but there i was bawling like a baby while harlow sat on my chest and stared at me. we were both confused.

the only thought that my sad brain could focus on was that i wanted to watch breakfast at tiffany’s.

i haven’t seen it in a few years and lost most of my dvds in the move but fortunately it was on netflix and i immediately turned it on. two things – 1. moon river made me cry more  2. i do love that movie.

what are your go-to movies when you need a pick me up?

random fact: did you know you can still buy the sunglasses that audrey wore in the movie? They’re Oliver Goldsmith’s Manhattan sunglasses.

little letters

dear blog readers,
you’re the nicest.

dear red lipstick,
you brighten my day.

dear pugsleys,
i’m so sad you’re moving.

dear neighbor,
thank you SO MUCH for mowing my lawn.

dear harlow,
thanks for being my dog.

dear ice cream maker,
i’m glad i got you out this week.

dear forever21,
thanks for having $8 sandals.

dear kids next door,
her name is harlow, not carlos.

ok so it’s only monday and i don’t want to jinx it. i have an interview tomorrow for a job i really, really want so i’m crossing everything i’ve got.

i’ll get there

some days it feel like i haven’t made any progress getting back to the old or normal “me”. or maybe i’ll have a few good days in a row and then a panic attack or a really bad day smacks in the face and it feels like i’m starting all over again and that any progress i might have made is wiped out. it’s hard to be objective about your own progress. 

i was reading nie nie’s blog and last month she blogged about doing a flip on the trampoline for the first time since her accident. she was really excited and proud of herself and brought her whole family out to watch her do it again. and even though i don’t read her blog much i was proud of her too. 

i’ve been thinking if there was anything in my own life that i could consider progress. sometimes i feel so very far away from where i was that progress doesn’t even seem possible. like the distance between then and now is too great. BUT in an effort to focus on the positive i did think of a few things and while they might not seem like a big deal to someone else they mean something to me. each one of them means a step towards getting my life and “me” back. 

1. i started blogging again. // for me this has been huge whether or not anyone is reading it. 

2. i moved to utah. // at the time it felt like i was running away and maybe i was but it was a risk leaving the familiar and “start overing” somewhere else. 

3. movies under the stars. // i don’t like being out at night much. my anxiety is peaked and it’s hard for me to relax and enjoy myself. i also tend to get nervous in big crowds but last week i went to see an outdoor movie on the lawns of the utah capitol. i brought harlow with me and that helped and we met friends for a picnic before the movie and i even saw some of my former students there. it was sort of fun. i can’t say i was totally at ease but i did it. (harlow, on the other hand, had the time of her life – sneaking over to other people’s blankets to try and snuggle with them and making friends with a poodle named cosette and loving every single kid she could get to.) 

4. finding the perfect waterproof eyeliner. // okay this doesn’t really count as progress but as i mentioned before my emotions are pretty much right at the surface 90% of the time and i cry, well, a lot. i’d basically given up on eyeliner because no matter what brand i tried it always lead to a very unattractive raccoon face. however stila’s stay all day liquid eyeliner is pretty cry proof.

it’s not much of a list but it’s better than nothing. hopefully i’ll be able to add most substantial things to this list one day soon.

image borrowed from a house in the hills

a thank you and a weekend wrap up

you guys. i don’t know what to say. thank you so much for the kind, supportive, encouraging words. thank you doesn’t seem like enough. 
when i was writing that post i was preparing myself for the worst – for people to be critical, judgmental, annoyed, weird and i don’t know what else. i did not prepare myself for the outpouring of kindness and compassion that came. thank you. each comment, tweet, email, and text was like a healing balm to my soul. 
i know not everything will change at once and that there will still be hard days and sleepless nights but letting go of that feels like a big step in the right direction. so thank you again. thank you for giving me hope, for helping me breathe a little easier and for just being here. 
and now some happy things.

my friend and i saw despicable me 2 and it was so funny and sweet.

this also made me smile. i’m a sucker for a flash mob.

i like dustin hoffman a little bit more.

boston bombing survivor recovers like a super hero.

have a wonderful, safe weekend! harlow is having a sleep over all weekend. she’s super excited!

this awesome “defaced” polaroid is by the one and only jen gotch

starting over

um, hi.

i’m not even sure what to say. what do you say when you start a blog over? i don’t really know.

it has really been a long time and so much has happened and i’ve changed in so many ways. but i missed the little place on the web i’d created as my “home”. when a friend asked me what i enjoyed doing and what i could do “for me” a little voice in the back of my head whispered, “blogging.” i loved the creative (and sometimes not so creative) outlet and mostly the community of people i had met and interacted with that had become friends.

so here i am. starting over. i think it took me so long to come back because i was scared about explaining why i left. but that’s not for today.

today i’m just here to say hi.

and ps, i love july. have a wonderful (and safe!) 4th of july weekend!

now i just need to work on getting this place looking decent.

instagram photos from the weekend

polaroids of erin and me off to see dolly parton on friday at the hollywood bowl. then some yummy watermelon pinkberry on saturday.

oh dolly. she’s amazing! if you don’t love dolly i’m not sure we can be friends. she’s such a talented, funny, amazing woman. it was such a great concert.

i picked up some cupcakes from enjoy cupcakes. sprinkles doesn’t hold a candle to amber’s amazing creations. my favorite was the strawberry cucumber mint chardonnay. heaven.

but of course we stopped at sprinkles anyway and erin bought harlow her very first cupcake. and poor harlow waited patiently for me to snap a photo before she got to dive in. such a good girl!

now i need a serious detox to come down from the sugar high. except my fridge is full of cupcakes. thanks erin for a fun weekend! xo

happy birthday harlow

i’m a little bit behind by my little pup turned three. if you can even imagine i love her three times as much as i did when we first met. did you know her full name is harlow honey child? my inner hippie was thriving when i named her.

weekend in la

harlow and i made a quick trip to LA this weekend. the rain stopped and it was sunny and blue. thank goodness.

i went to the temple on saturday.

and harlow almost got us kicked out of our room… but i snuck her back in! she was as good as gold but i was nervous that we’d get kicked out so i didn’t get much sleep.
(and fyi the front desk said it was okay to bring her but the security guard said she wasn’t allowed…ugh!)

i took my new (to me) pentax camera i got from jen out for a little bit. we’ll see how it turns out when i finish the roll of film.

and then we hit up the oh.ban.fest yard sale. hot dang i scored some great things and got to meet bri, jen, joy, paige, em, jasmine and i’m probably forgetting some other blog/twitter friends. SO fun! it was also pretty funny introducing myself as “joiebutter”… make sure you pick a blog/twitter name you like!

harlow loves her new bed from bri… she loves it! and i took home a few of these ladies from jen.

then we headed home to watch the oscar’s and visit with my cousin who was in town. i’m ready to head back to la now!